• Essay: Comedian Theo Von meets MTV’s Rob Dyrdek and it’s intense

    I haven’t watched Rob Dyrdek on TV in years. My time for tele-viewing consists solely of NFL football, Dexter, and Criminal Minds DVR’d. (If I could have Shamar Moore and Lt. Deborah Morgan on my Fantasy squad, life would be complete.) So, I didn’t recognize his Rob-ness when I approached the only person on a Sunset Blvd. studio patio last week, to buy a cigarette. That’s right, I said ‘buy.’

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    Comedian Theo Von’s journey to Guantanamo Bay

    I left Los Angeles at 11 pm. Twenty hours later I am sitting here in Fort Lauderdale, at an upscale gas station waiting for the 180-minute plane ride to Guantanamo Naval Base. Myself and three other comedians were told we’d leave at noon. It’s 8:55 pm and a man named Ramon, who is supposed to pilot us there, has allegedly just landed. I have yet to see him. It’s been

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    Guest essay: The Mila Kunis Experience, by Theo Von

    Yesterday I saw Mila Kunis. Yes that MILA KUNIS. The hot one. The funny one. The small, bigger-than-life one. I saw her in the flesh. At Starbucks. Cuz you know, Mila and I go to the same Starbucks. I looked up from writing a script/facebooking/waiting-for-my-big-break, to see this petite, semi-Middle Eastern, maybe-Latin, quasi-Hawaiian, possibly-Russian Hebrew girl, standing around with an even-smaller-than-her adult gentleman. I didn’t think anything of it, because

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